Journal · Writing

I’ve Become My Parents

In response to The Daily Post’s Writing Prompt:  I’ve Become My Parents

Do you ever find yourself doing something your parents used to do when you were a kid,  despite the fact you hated it back then?

MotherI have become my parent,  and quite frankly,  I despise it.   But not in the way you are thinking right now,  I hate it because I have become the parent to my parent.

I found that I had to stop my world and put a pause in my life in order to care for my mother.   I find myself telling her what to do and what not to do.   Strangely enough,  I literally have to tell her to things as if she were a child,  “Why are your clothes on the bed?”,  “Fix your bed”,  “The floor is not the garbage”,   “You are leaving a trail of your tissue all over the place”,  “Stop spitting on the floor”,   “Eat your vegetables”,  “No you can not eat sweets”,  need I go on.   In the beginning I had a hard way to go in letting her know all the wrong she was doing.  I didn’t understand it,  it truly bothered me.  Why should I have to explain things to her,  she should know,  right.   Until the doctors and nurses explained that it was okay.   It happens.   I was truly hurt,  but I had to,  as the saying goes,  man up and take charge.    I still don’t like it.   I don’t enjoy it at all.   I have been doing it for quite some time now and I still don’t like,  but nevertheless.   I am still doing it.   Taking care of the woman that raised me and took care of me basically in the same manner that she raised me,  of course with some differences.

I don’t hate my mother, I love her dearly, but what I do hate is that she is doing all the opposite of what she didn’t like.  She is not senile,  she doesn’t have alzheimer’s disease,  so I don’t get it.   I do remember my always trying to help her keeping the house clean.   So that can’t be it,  I am so baffled by what she is doing that it makes me crazy sometimes.   I don’t believe in putting her in a home.   She was in there for a while for rehabilitation and she was getting depress.   I even felt as if I were visiting her in prison.   The place was sad, dreary, and dark.  Where she was placed,  there seemed to be no life,  no joy,  it looked oh so sad of a place to spend the rest of your life.   It was taking a horrible toll on me.   I told a nurse there that I need to get her out of there because I don’t believe she deserves to be put away in prison.   She was a good mom.   I just don’t understand the turn around of her being now, is all.

4 thoughts on “I’ve Become My Parents

  1. You are doing what many children refuse to do, care. Always honor your mother has become a test for you. Be thankful she isn’t mean and cursing. There has to be a medication answer, good luck. Stay strong.

    1. Thank you. You are right, she isn’t mean nor does she curse. She does however give me this look like how dare I reprimand her, which makes everyone laugh, because there is no escaping laughter at her stern look, it is to cute.

  2. I have experienced being a parent to your parent. Not easy. I don’t know why some parents becomes childlike, but it is not unusual.

    There are ‘prison’ like facilities and there are lovely, homelike facilities. I moved my mother from her home where she was totally struggling (even with in home care) to an Assisted Living facility where she has just blossomed. She went from being scared of her own shadow to being elected President of the citizens council her facility. She has made many good friends and recently, a nice gentleman has caught her eye.

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